


Heart that's Healing

by eeeeeeeeeerenjaegar, orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Ghosts, High School AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-25
Updated: 2014-11-30
Packaged: 2017-12-30 09:53:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1017184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eeeeeeeeeerenjaegar/pseuds/eeeeeeeeeerenjaegar, https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They were ridiculously in love. They both hated the world, and it hated them - so they would hide away, completely off the radar. They would hurry to the train tracks that no one could see from any angle of the city. They were ridiculously in love, and now they're both ridiculously dead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> we decided to put some of the warnings in the notes so we don't clutter up the tags:  
> suicide, deep depression, character death, bullying/slurs, and gore/blood. most of these don't come into play yet, so we'll put something in the notes when they do. thank you all for reading!! u v u
> 
> title from the song All Around Me by Flyleaf.

 

He didn't remember falling asleep, but that wasn't even the strange part. He didn't wake up in the comfort of his own bed with Levi's arms wrapped around him. He didn't have any memories from the night before that came rushing back to him, Eren just woke up abruptly, sitting upright in a seat next to Levi.

 

Besides a priest talking loudly, the only thing he could hear was muffled sobbing. Eren turned to Levi, trying to block out the noises of the people in front of them. Levi was staring off into space, probably not paying attention to anything, either. He just looked like he was in pain. 

 

“Levi, are you okay? Who died?”

 

He shifted a little bit, but didn't reply. Didn't even look at him.

 

“Levi? Did I fall asleep? Shit, I probably did.” Eren frowned. “Hello?”

 

Eren tried waving his hand in front of his face, but he didn't even flinch. “Helloooo? Levi?"

 

He gave up trying to get Levi's attention and he looked down at the floor. This made him even more confused, though, because he noticed his clothes. It wasn't proper clothes for a funeral – too informal. It was a shock Levi let him show up dressed like this. No one was paying attention to him, though, since the two were sitting in the back of the room.

 

The priest cleared his throat loud enough for Eren to look up. “Would anyone like to share some good memories?” He asked, and everyone in the room glanced at each other. When no one volunteered, Levi stood up quickly and walked up to the podium. Eren's eyes fell on the closed casket next to him, and he shuddered.

 

The way Levi looked standing up there broke Eren's heart. The way he took a deep breath before he began, the way his voice cracked when he talked, especially when he said Eren's name-

 

Wait.

 

“Our first kiss was.....yeah. _There._ We kissed and it felt like life. I loved that adorable nerd.”

 

Soft laughter throughout the room.

 

Panic consumed Eren. Loved. _Loved._ This had to be some sort of sick joke. No, it was probably a nightmare. Yes. He would wake up to birds chirping and sunlight streaming in through the windows and Levi will open his eyes and mumble a “good morning” and..it was bound to happen. Right? Yeah, vivid nightmares happen to everyone. Maybe he should try pinching himself or -

 

“I remember how we would go to that spot almost every day after school. It used to be somewhere we could go for peace, it really _was_ beautiful. We both have so many photographs of...wow, sorry, I'm a wreck. It was like a..a safe haven, I guess you could say.”

 

Levi bit his lip and closed his eyes. “I don't think the kid knew how much I loved him...I...”

 

He took another deep breath. He looked so miserable, the look of utter pain on his face. Eren started to believe this was _his_ funeral, but he quickly pushed the thought away, dismissed this whole ordeal as one shitty nightmare.

 

“...I..I think I need to leave the room..”

 

Eren watched as Levi fled, and the brunet couldn't help but chase after him, despite the murmur that ran through the crowd. He wasn't just going to let him leave like that, right in the middle of someone's service. Who's service was it, anyway? Eren had known nearly everyone there- had it been Armin? Mikasa? No, he distinctly remembered seeing them there. One of Levi's friends? He remembered how Levi talked about their first kiss, and he felt even more confused. No. This was probably a bad dream..or something. Something like that, anyway. God dammit.

 

Eren shook away the questions, the thoughts that plagued him. Where the fuck was Levi even going?

 

"Are you gonna talk to me? Levi, what's wrong with you?" Eren called, trailing closely behind his partner as he walked. He furrowed his brows, and bit at the inside of his cheek. "Hey!" He snapped, expression going from irritation to pure hurt. Why wouldn't Levi talk to him?

 

Nearly a half an hour passed, and at this point, the darker-haired male had shed his coat, and his white button-up was no longer tucked into the waistband of his dress pants. Eren had given up trying to get his attention, and instead followed him silently. They ended up walking a desolate road- one that was overly familiar. He and Levi had walked it nearly every day, before they went home.

 

There was the buildings, the hill, and then the railroad tracks, the ones that he and Levi often visited. The tracks were still in use, no matter how abandoned they looked. Grass up to the knees, flowers vibrant and healthy. Eren and Levi often visited said tracks, laying on them, walking on the metal rails for hours. Eren would hide his bike, and Levi his skateboard, and they would disappear, off the face of the Earth, surrounded by only each other. Eren smiled- he loved this place so much. The field, the tracks, everything.

 

So when they turned off the road, and stepped out onto the tracks, Eren was confused as to why Levi had started crying. Why were there flowers here? Cards? Who'd died here? Oh fuck.

 

"I'm so sorry, Eren." Levi had whispered, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

 

"Why? Levi, are you gonna cry?" Eren asked, incredulous. As the boy reached over to wipe his partner's tears, something caught his eye.

 

There was blood all over the tracks, dying the metal and the grass near it. And then Eren was painfully aware - it a stab to the heart, plaguing his mind and tearing apart his limbs with pain.

 

~

 

"I love you." Levi whispered, turning to face a bright-eyed and grinning Eren. 

 

Together, they lie on the tracks, listening to the sounds of the city during midday. The far-off trains, the cars the rushed by on the road above them, the birds that flew overhead, standing out against the bright blue skies, that were slowly turning orange. The type of sunset that only happened in late October.

 

"I love you more." Eren said, eyes shining as he shifted so his head rested upon his hands, arms above his head.

 

"Suuure you do," Levi mumbled, moving to lay atop Eren. He pressed their lips together, feeling as his lover hummed pleasantly. Somewhere, a train's whistle sounded, and Eren pulled away.

 

"You think we should move?" The brunet asked, staring up at Levi lovingly.

 

"No, it's fine. It's probably a different set of tracks. The one leaving." Levi mumbled, nodding to the neighboring rails as his lips returned to find Eren's.

 

That was how they stayed, lips moving against each other's passionately, but carefully. Slow and gentle was the kiss they shared, like some of them tended to be. Their kisses weren't usually anything but quick, needy, and hungry- but sometimes, on occasions like this, they were soft, and meaningful.

 

But as the train got louder, and Eren grew more anxious, he still didn't break from Levi. He wasn't going to ruin the moment, not this time. So what happened next was something neither of them expected.

 

The train had come around the bend- both boys struggled to stand, and Levi threw himself off the tracks, sliding into the grass near the road, one hand flying out, reaching for a struggling Eren. The boy had barely stood, yelling the whole way. He stood on shaking legs, moved, lost his footing. Levi screamed, motioning for him to hurry the fuck up, and oh God Eren yelled something that died in the wind and just like that-

 

Blood painted the grass, and the tracks, the gravel. Everything was silent, there was no wind, and there were no birds. No cars.

 

And Levi screamed and fell to his knees as he realized that the love of his life was just mutilated in front of him.

 

~

 

Eren felt pure pain wrack him, and he felt dizzy. It exploded behind his eyes, stung his fingertips, and a scream caught in his throat as he realized his heart wasn't beating. He struggled to cry, but he couldn't. He could only let out the sound, the most alien sound he'd ever let come from his throat

 

Because in that moment, it wasn't that Levi had been ignoring him; he couldn't see him. He couldn't hear him. In fact, the funeral they'd just been at wasn't a friend's. It was his own. Eren was dead, and when he looked down, the dried blood on his white and black jacket told him that it was so.

 

He tried to stand up again, but his legs refused to support his weight, so he fell to the ground and felt pain shoot up his bones. Eren tried to crawl to Levi, scoot towards him, anything to let him know that he was there and he wasn't sure _why_ but did that matter when they just got back from his own funeral.  “Levi,” He whimpered, “please look up. I'm right here.” The way Levi's shoulders shook with sobs made him want to-

 

Levi wouldn't feel it, but Eren wrapped his arms around him and buried his face in his shoulder. He felt every ragged breath that left his boyfriend's throat, every shake, and God it was fucking horrifying. The fact Levi didn't acknowledge his presence at all made Eren cry harder. His grip tightened, but Levi never looked his way. Never pecked him on top of his head, trying to get him to calm down. He never would again.

 

Eren looked up slowly, and then unwrapped his arms. Almost hesitantly, with a shaking hand, he tucked a loose strand of Levi's hair behind his ear. It moved. He had no idea why, when Levi couldn't feel anything else. He was dizzy with confusion but he tried not to focus on that. Eren had always played with Levi's hair, and it never failed to make him fall asleep almost instantly. This time, though, all Levi did was look up with curiosity and sniffle.

 

“Weird. The wind isn't blowing,” He mumbled, and then turned back to face the tracks.

 

Eren sat beside him, and they both stared at the railroad tracks together. It almost felt like the...the old times. It was different, though. This wasn't the peaceful silence Eren was used to. The silence made him want to scream, made him want to shake Levi and slap him across the face and claw at the ground just for Levi to _notice him_. He didn't though. He was just numb. He couldn't move, he couldn't speak. Couldn't scream. Just sit and pretend things were normal.

 

“Son of a _bitch,_ ” Levi hissed, making Eren jump.

 

“These memorials are a real goddamn sight. They all act like they cared about Eren and then they'll go home after laying down some card with a cheesy quote just to make them feel good about themselves, and then they'll forget about him in twenty fucking minutes because he was nothing to them.” He sighed and buried his face in his hands. “Look at me. I'm starting to talk to myself. Pathetic.”

 

Eren reached out a hand to stroke his hair, but stopped himself, and then pulled back. It was no use. Might as well get used to it, maybe then he wouldn't be so miserable. Levi couldn't see nor feel him, and Eren wanted to know why. Just why. What kind of punishment was this - watching his loved ones suffer when he couldn't do shit. He needed to move on, right? Yeah. That had to be the solution. Moving on to the next plane of existence while waiting for his family, his friends, for Levi.

 

~

 

  
“LE-”

 

And like that, he was gone. The blood splattered the ground like red paint, the paint Eren would sometimes use to paint pictures, and Levi let out a scream. He heard footsteps behind him, but couldn’t force himself look at them. His eyes were squeezed shut, because he didn't want to see what was left of Eren, and he screamed. He screamed like an animal, barely bothering to muffle them with his hands. There was no point.

 

Sirens? Whoever walked up behind him must have called the police. Damn, they arrived quickly. Or maybe Levi lost track of time because Eren was..

 

No. He wasn't dead. Just a bit bloody, that’s all. He’d get up, go to the hospital, and give Levi that stupid fucking thumbs up like he always did to signal that he was fine. Levi opened his eyes and turned his head to look behind him- his eyes met those of two officers, who were jogging towards him. Fuck no, he hated cops. Paramedics followed closely behind, though they could only be heard in the distance. Fuck. Why wasn't he crying? Shouldn't he be crying over shit like this? But Eren wasn't dead, right? Hasn't there been people that survived after being hit by trains? Eren was one of them. Probably. Yes, they would take him to the hospital or _something_ and he'll be fine..

 

One of the officers held out a hand and helped him up, and Levi shook his head, his thoughts filling his head like a migraine. “Eren’s not dead, he’s fine. Just someone..someone go help him up. He’s fine.” It was hard to breathe. His chest tightened and his heart twisted, but he couldn't let himself react to it. He had to convince them Eren was fine or he would die before he can get help. Now wasn't the time for the water works.

 

Other officers rushed to the scene behind them, but Levi didn't dare look. The officer stared down at him, his dark eyes filing with a look of pity. Sympathy. Whatever it was, it normally would have made Levi want to punch something. He didn't need anyone's fucking pity. Especially when Eren was going to live. “Sir,” The officer said, his voice barely above a whisper, “I'm afraid-”

 

“I fucking told you, go help him up. He’s fine.” 

 

“I'm sorry for your loss-”

 

“Stop. Eren's right there. See? He-” Levi couldn’t help cutting them off. Eren was alive. He was fine. He knew he was fine. He prayed he was fine.

 

Levi finally turned around to face Eren, but he wasn't expecting what he would see at all. In fact, the grotesque, bloody mess didn't resemble what was once Eren in any way, shape or form. The only way he knew it was Eren was the jacket; oh, the ripped, bloodstained jacket that once looked so well on him. He never failed to wear it nearly every day; sometimes, when it was cold, he’d even give it to Levi to hold on to. Eren would never let it look like that. It was shredded. Eren himself was fucking shredded. His body and legs a mangled mess, arms hanging limply at his sides and crushed under the weight of the train, but his face...oh God, oh God his fucking face. His skull was bloody. Dented. Smashed. His eyes were opened and glossy and staring at nothing and his mouth was opened in a permanent scream of horror.

 

Levi had to cover his mouth to keep from vomiting.

 

He gagged, but he couldn't look away from his boyfriend's mangled corpse. It burned into his mind, taunted him, made him want to scream and rip out chunks of his brain just so it would go away. He was trying to remember how beautiful Eren once was, with his soft brown hair and his mesmerizing green eyes, the fucking jacket that he wore every day and how it looked so amazing on him. This image would never leave his mind, no matter how many days, weeks, months passed. This is probably how he was going to remember Eren for the rest of his life, in all honesty. Eren. Eren Eren Eren sweet Eren the love of his life Eren _FUCKING DEAD EREN._

 

Levi let out a sob.

 

He couldn't stop staring at the body.

 

Eren was hurt _(dead dead_ _HE'S FUCKING DEAD),_ and this time, he wouldn’t be getting up.

 

“Really, I am sorry, but do you think you can tell us what happened?”

 

He didn't even try to argue anymore. It was too late. Eren was gone, and it was his fault. But he wasn't dead. No. He didn't want to think of him like that..he..

 

“We were… Cutting across to get home. We didn’t feel like taking the long way home- we’d both been pretty tired. We figured we could beat the train. I did, but he obviously didn’t. We didn’t mean to- we didn’t think the tracks were still in use.” Complete and utter bullshit, but he figured they’d buy it. A trespassing charge was probably going to smack him in the face later, but at this point, Levi’s only struggle was keeping from crying.

 

“The jacket,” Levi said loudly, making some police officers start. “I need his jacket."

 

They glanced at each other. “That might be dangerous right now, since this man just di-”

 

“Please. I’m asking you nicely, I’m begging you, give me that jacket. You might not understand, but I need it.” Levi reasoned, tried to get them to understand - 

 

“We can’t do that. It’s a biohazard.” One of them replied curtly, nodding slightly. “We truly are sorry.” 

 

“Good to know. Can I go home? I just- let me go home.” The teen pleaded, looking away and then back at the officers.

 

An hour or two passed, and there were questions. Question after question- what happened, what had they been doing, did they go there often, things of the like. It was infuriating, the way they asked, like it was Levi who killed him or something. Like they fucking suspected him of doing something, suspected Levi of hurting Eren. He would never, and he made damn sure to get that point across. Was Eren diagnosed with any mental disorders, they asked. Did depression run in his family. Did Levi ever have thoughts of harming another person. Shut up, shut up, shut up, they needed to shut up and be fucking respectful for once in their goddamn lives.

 

Once their questions were done, they offered to take him home, to which Levi declined. He still had to take Eren’s bike home. He loved that thing, loved it to bits, and there was never a moment where Eren was away from it for too long. He was always cleaning the chain, or buying new parts for it. Like hell Levi would let that thing rot here.

 

He sighed loudly and went to grab Eren's bike, still near a large patch of grass, standing upright on its kickstand that was dug into the dirt. It was just like he’d left it, front wheel leaning off the right. He nearly felt like he shouldn’t touch it, like he should leave it- but he didn’t. He couldn’t. Someone would steal it. Maybe Levi will take it to his family when he felt like it. He probably should. Right now his only goal was to get home and...

 

Oh. Eren was gone. Ha, now he didn't really know what in the hell to do. Drown his sorrows, hopefully drown himself in the process.

 

Levi hopped on the bike, pedaling down the street as fast as he could go. He glanced at the few people lined up at the side of the tracks, looks of horror on their faces. One or two had been watching him and truth be told, he wanted to punch every single one of him. They shouldn't be around Eren, Levi thought, because he should be down there holding Eren close. Singing to him and telling him the pain would stop soon, and that it was only temporary. They didn't deserve to be by him. They didn't love him like Levi did. An officer moved in to start clearing people out, deterring them from the scene. Levi wasn’t about to lie- he wanted them to leave, because Eren had just fucking died, and his death wasn’t a goddamn showcase. 

 

He wanted to get as far away as possible. As he continued down the quiet street, the tears that he didn't shed at the tracks prickled at his eyes. Overwhelming pain suddenly hit him, replacing the numb state he was in. His heart ached for Eren, he just wanted to hold him one more time; wanted to sing him to sleep while Eren played with his hair and he wanted to pull him close as they kissed and _oh God._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also i feel like i (as in phoenix. hi.) should warn you all that this fic is,,not in chronological order. it all goes back and fourth between events and memories and times and shit a lot, so it can get confusing :000


	2. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There were too many thoughts, so he burned them all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings for the chapter are alcohol and depression.

 

Levi had left the bike near the front steps, shakily moving to set the kickstand down before going inside and locking the door behind him. His apartment was so empty now, quiet and without so much of a groan from the floors beneath him. It was bigger to him now - empty without the usual company of Eren alongside him. There was no one, nothing to be heard, and Levi’s emotions were running about as wild as wild gets.

 

  
He was distraught, unsure if he was supposed to be angry or cry, and he didn’t want to move. He pressed his back up against the door, taking deep breathes as he weighed his options. Sleep was one of them, though he didn’t know if he’d be getting any sleep in the next few days, let alone right now. Shutting his eyes, the images of his boyfriend getting hit by that stupid fucking train flashed behind his eyelids, and he had no choice but to open them, hoping to rid himself of the vicious slideshow that wouldn’t stop playing in his mind.

 

  
Levi’s eyes quickly flicked to the entrance of his kitchen, his legs automatically moving as he stepped forward, boots hitting the tile with a _thud_. He searched everywhere and anywhere, trying his hardest to not lose every single ounce of restraint he’d kept until this point. Shaking hands searched every corner, every shelf for the thing he was looking for. He knew there was booze somewhere in the house; his parents never got rid of it before their deployment.

 

  
With just a few more minutes of searching, Levi’s efforts had proven successful- he’d pulled a dusty, half-filled bottle of vodka from the depths of one of the cabinets in his kitchen. He didn’t really bother with a glass, there was no point- anything to take his mind of that days’ event was good enough for him. He brought it back to the couch, where he’d planned to drown his sorrows with the stinging taste of alcohol.

 

  
Of course, with the dark-haired male’s heavy consumption came a pleasant blankness, indicating that if he wanted to completely get rid of the demons in his head, he’d need to go a little harder on the bottle. He’d made a dent, that much was absolute; and he didn’t plan on stopping until there was nothing left in the goddamn thing. Still though, thoughts of his late boyfriend swam in his dizzied head, and he tried as hard as he could to get rid of them. To no avail, though- and the only thing Levi could think to do was grab paper and a pen, and write down what he was feeling.

 

 

Levi had spent at least an hour trying to write something legible, something that made at least some kind of fucking sense. But his pen and his hand weren’t cooperating with him, and no matter how hard he tried, he just ended up tossing the paper he’d wrote on. Until, with tears in his clouded grey eyes, he finally wrote something at least halfway decent.

 

  
  
_eren i dont exactly know where you are but i seriously hope its better than here because you dont need all the bullshit here i really think youd hate it because i fucking do and jesus christ i cant even begin to explain to you how much i miss you already fuck come home i dont know how im going to keep going im going to be honest with you i need you around okay i need you like a fuckin tree needs carbon dioxide eren please dont leave me alone here i cant do this its already too quiet fucking hell angel i miss you so much already its ridiculous and im so sorry you didnt fucking deserve to die like that i_

 

  
The will to finish what he wrote slowly dissipated, and Levi sat back and let the tears fall freely, not one noise falling from his lips. There was nothing to say, and flat out sobbing wasn’t going help the goddamn situation. So he closed his eyes, drying to let the once-pleasant dizziness return to him.

 

  
~

 

  
The memory of that week was a blur. It was a never-ending cycle of getting as drunk as he could, sleeping on the couch because there were too many goddamn memories associated with his bedroom, and wishing he was dead. He tried to avoid the bathroom as much as possible, because his bedroom was right across from it, but it was hard when everything made him sick. He also found himself showering with scorching hot water, hoping he would feel something other than depression, hoping the stinging of his skin after he stepped out of the tub would help him snap out of this numbness, but all it did was make him miss Eren even more because he liked warm showers.

 

  
Sometimes, though, he would stare at his bedroom door and think about opening it, but that was too overwhelming. Eren's shirts would be on the floor, his drawings would be hanging up on the walls, fuck, the photographs of the railroad tracks would be right next to the drawings, too.

 

  
Levi found himself desperately clinging to the memories he had with Eren. There were so many things he couldn't remember, so many days that were pointless back then, and it made him feel pathetic. When he tried to remember something, he felt happy for a split second, but then the numbness washed over him once again. He wished he had stopped and took time to appreciate everything about Eren, because he felt like he would forget and move on. And that was terrifying.

 

  
The funeral was a week later.

 

  
Levi stood up and stretched. Something about the funeral was the worst part of it all. Even after he watched Eren die right before his very eyes, there was still doubt somewhere in the back of his mind. He tormented himself with that doubt, trying to convince himself that Eren was still alive and they were all just lying to him, but the funeral was his answer; Eren was definitely dead, and he wasn't coming back.

 

  
Levi started to walk home, the sun finally starting to set. He wished he had gloves. The cold October air bit at his cheeks and left his hands numb, but he never bothered to buy gloves because if he ever felt cold, he would hold Eren's hand. Fuck, Halloween was in a few days, too. Eren always loved Halloween. He had to go ten days before one of his favorite holidays. God damn. October 21st, huh. Officially marked as the worst day of his life. Officially marked as the day Eren lost his life.

 

  
He couldn't help but stare at other people as he walked home. Mothers carrying children, groups of friends going out somewhere since it was Saturday, cars rushing by in a blur. It was all too normal. He lost the love of his life and these people are living their every day lives like nothing ever happened. It made him want to punch something. Eren would always hold him back from his somewhat violent urges that got him into more shit than it was worth - when he was angry, he hit things, simple as that. His boyfriend seemed to have a knack for calming him down. Now that he was gone, Levi wasn't sure what he would do with himself. Get arrested. probably.

 

  
When he was finally back home, he took off his suit in the laundry room, putting on some pajamas afterwards.

 

  
He folded up the suit and sighed, sitting it on top of the washing machine. Hell, even the suit was a reminder of Eren. It was a gift for his birthday. His first birthday after they started dating, to be exact. Eren watched him open it before he rushed home, and then came back a few hours later, insisting that he wear it. He then took them to the nicest restaurant in town, like the one-hundred dollar suit wasn't enough already. It wasn't crowded, since his birthday was on Christmas, and it was one of the happiest nights of Levi's life.

 

  
He couldn't take it.

 

  
Levi hurried out of the laundry room and walked across the apartment. He had no idea what he was doing, but he had to do something or else he was going to explode. _My mind's a fucking wreck. A train wreck. Ha. Fuck._

 

  
He threw open the door to his bedroom and walked across the floor, only focusing on the photographs on the wall in front of him. Levi had always loved photography, and Eren gave him a reason to take photos. But that was gone. Everything was _gone._

 

  
Standing on the bed, he yanked all of them down, trying not to look at them. That would be too much. When the last photograph was down, he stacked them into a neat pile. He already felt tears welling up in the corner of his eyes, but he blinked them away as he climbed off of his bed. There was no use in crying now. Eren was gone, he was gone, he was dead and he wasn't coming back and he was six feet under the fucking ground.

 

His eye caught something on the wall, and he took a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut in hopes of blocking it out.

 

  
The painting.

 

  
Levi loved photography, and Eren loved art. Levi liked capturing the moment, Eren liked reliving the moment by drawing it. It was their simple passions. The first time Levi saw the damn kid, he was drawing. He was amazing at it, too. Eren almost always had a pencil or a brush in his hand, and Levi always admired that. Something about his love for art and determination while simply creating was beautiful in itself.

 

  
Eren also liked to experiment with watercolor. One day, he showed up to Levi's house with a piece of paper in his hands. Eren's face turned red as he handed it to him, but it made Levi's jaw drop in amazement. It was a drawing of Levi, painted with watercolor, and it was incredible. That was the only way he could describe it. It looked exactly like him. There was not a single flaw about it. He shook his head in amazement, and later that night he hung it up on his wall next to the photographs.

 

  
No.

 

  
Levi shook his head, getting out of that room as quickly as possible. He wouldn't dare touch it. The drawing was proof that Eren was alive. He was a human, he had hobbies and interests and God he was perfect and he's gone _he's fucking gone._

 

  
He hurried back into his kitchen, looking through the different drawers for a lighter. He finally found one, and with shaking hands, he shoved it into the pocket on his sweatpants and opened the back door. The night was freezing, but he didn't care. He didn't care about anything. Dying from frostbite would be a pleasure.

 

  
Slamming his door shut behind him, he made his way across his backyard and sat down on the ground. With the pile of photos in his hands, he pulled his lighter out of his pocket and held a picture out in front of him. He tried not to think about it. He tried to tell himself that the photographs didn't mean anything to him, that it would only cause him pain to keep them hanging up on the wall, and it worked.

 

  
Next thing he knew, the photo was up in flames, and he flicked it over his shoulder. Next photo. Over and over and over. They didn't mean anything to him, dammit.

 

  
The last one.

 

 

Levi's stomach flipped at the sight. It was Eren sitting on his couch one afternoon. He was looking up at the camera with wide, sparkling eyes, his grin the cutest thing Levi has ever seen. He just looked..alive. His arms were crossed over his chest, and his jacket was laying on the couch, and..

 

 

Levi sighed, putting it in his pocket, along with the lighter. He couldn't burn that, he couldn't if he tried.


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He never expected to hear his phone ring. Never expected to hear that voice again, either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a formal apology for not updating in 20 years.  
> trigger warnings for some gore and some alcohol.

 

 

After the funeral, Eren followed Levi home, but he felt surprised he could even walk. He felt extremely dizzy and overall weak, and he wanted to lean on Levi for support, but he would probably fall right through him.

 

 

They finally reached Levi's house, and Eren had no choice but to follow Levi to the laundry room. He felt like he was about to pass out, but he had no idea if ghosts could even pass out, so he was left to wonder what the fuck was going on. There needed to be a manual for new ghosts.  _Woke up in the middle of your own funeral? Your boyfriend is miserable and you can't comfort him? You have no idea how long it's been since you died and you're honestly terrified? Well, this book is for you!_

 

 

Eren wandered out of the laundry room and into the familiar living room. It didn't feel right. Something about it just felt odd and out of place, even though it was still the same house he's been in many times before. It felt like he was watching a movie and he wasn't actually there.

 

 

Levi left the laundry room a few minutes later, wearing pajamas and his hands bawled up into fists. Eren watched as he threw open his bedroom door and disappeared into his bedroom. Eren followed, because he really had no other choice and didn't want to be left alone, but at the same time he wanted to give Levi some space.

 

 

He was yanking the old photographs down from the wall, and Eren felt his jaw drop in amazement. Levi loved those photos. He was really proud of his photography, and Eren loved listening to him happily ramble about some photo he took. The ones he hung up on the wall were special, though, because almost all of them had something to do with the train tracks. Fuck.

 

 

Levi didn't touch the painting.

 

 

He hurried out of the room, stack of photographs in his hands, but this time Eren stayed behind. Painting that one picture felt so long ago. He wanted to make Levi happy, and he had always loved watercolor, so he attempted to draw him and then paint it. It didn't turn out as well as he wanted it to, but Levi was ecstatic, so he didn't really mind, because the whole point was to make Levi happy. He spent hours working on it, too, so it felt good to have his efforts appreciated.

 

 

Eren gulped and looked away from the painting. He pressed his back against the wall, but that only made him more confused, because how come he didn't fall through? Whatever. He felt his knees give out below him as he sunk to the ground.

 

 

The house was silent. Levi must have left. Eren didn't care about being alone anymore, he really didn't. He was going to be alone until Levi died too, and Eren wasn't going to let that happen any time soon. He would get used to the feeling of being alone, the feeling that Levi was never going to talk to him ever again, because that's all he could do. And he was going to protect Levi in the process. Eren was not going to let Levi's life end before he got to experience the world. Of course he wanted Levi to hold him again, talk to him and sing to him, but he would have to put his own selfishness aside because Levi deserved to live a long life. Even if Eren didn't, Levi did, and Eren was going to make sure he would.

 

 

~

 

 

Levi fell asleep after he put the lighter away and rested the photo of Eren on his nightstand, right by the lamp. He thought about sleeping in his bedroom that night, but looking around at everything made him feel ill, so he shuffled back into the living room and fell asleep on his couch once again.

 

 

The dreams were the same as usual. It was Eren – beautiful, amazing Eren and his fucking eyes and his grin and his messy fucking hair and everything about him. It always ended with his death, how he was basically ripped to fucking shreds and how he was gone and never coming back and no he didn't have to die so young he should get a second chance please please  _please just give him a second chance and-_

 

 

Levi would bolt up, the sunrise poking in through the curtains, his back drenched in cold sweat. And then he would sigh and lay back down, the silence piercing his ears, the memory of Eren's arms wrapped around him trying to lull him back to sleep.

 

 

“I miss you so much,” He choked out, desperately hoping to hear Eren reply, assuring Levi that he was okay and he was right there and the nightmares can stop. Which was funny, because his life was a nightmare that made his dreams look weak.

 

 

He decided he would miss school again. There was no use going. He wanted to go to school so he could spend more time with Eren, and he did as well as he could in all of his classes so he could graduate with Eren, and then he could go to college with Eren and now Eren's dead. He couldn't stop saying that to himself. He was dead, he was gone, he was buried, he was hit by a fucking train, as if saying it over and over again would make it untrue. If you could say a word repeatedly and it stopped sounding like a word, why couldn't he do that with this? Why did it feel like there was a gaping hole in his chest that would never heal, why did it feel like Eren was still holding him when he wasn't, why did he want to die so he could see Eren again - wherever the hell Eren was. Levi sincerely hoped there was an afterlife so he could see him again, and then they would get a chance to finish what they started. And Levi could propose. And it would be wonderful. And they would forget the train, forget it even happened, forget that Levi lived the rest of his life in misery just  _waiting_. And he hoped that Eren would be waiting with open arms.

 

 

Did Eren miss him?

 

 

It was a question that plagued his mind every once in awhile. Maybe he had a cute new boyfriend in the afterlife he can actually spend eternity with. Levi's heart wrenched at the thought, but he didn't deserve Eren. He really didn't. He just watched him get hit by a train in awe, and now it was too late. Boyfriend of the fucking year award. And then he left in the middle of his funeral. He knew he was trash, but that just proved he was an awful human.

 

 

He looked up at the wall clock above the couch. 8:10 AM. He had nothing to do anymore besides mope around the house and think about his own grief or some poetic shit like that, but he threw the covers back and stood up from the couch anyway. Without really thinking, he walked into the laundry room, still rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He got dressed and slipped on his socks and boots, and he realized that this was the first time he put on actual clothes since Eren's death. If you didn't count the funeral, and he didn't want to count that. Would Eren be happy with him? Levi hoped so. He probably wasn't. He probably wanted to punch him in the face for letting him get hit by a train. What did getting dressed have to do with that? God dammit.

 

 

Levi started walking through the kitchen and towards the back door, but he realized he had nowhere to go. The only thing he could think of was the train tracks, but that would be torturing himself. The last time he went there was the day of the funeral, and it felt like someone was stabbing him in the heart repeatedly the whole time. It was closure. He didn't know if he wanted that or not.

 

 

Oh.

 

 

_Oh._

 

 

The funeral.

 

 

He hasn't visited Eren's grave yet.

 

 

This in itself was something Levi considered to be a no-brainer. Shouldn't he be crying over Eren's grave like some blonde in some shitty chick-flick? Wasn't that what lovers did for their dead ones? Cry over their grave, let mascara and eyeliner run down their cheeks because they didn't even give a shit anymore. Wasn't that proper procedure?

 

 

Of course it was. But Levi had already done his fair share of crying, of grieving, of lying around the house and staring at the ceiling thinking about Eren. What even was he anymore? Some auto-pilot grief machine? Yeah, sure, just sit on the couch and have a couple shots, cry, have some more booze, cry again, write some sappy letter to your dead boyfriend-

 

 

Dead boyfriend. Boy, didn't that have a ring to it?

 

 

Levi braced his hands on the kitchen counter, debating. He'd been to Eren's funeral, he'd spoken at Eren's funeral, then he ditched early because he didn't want to cry. Brave. Real brave. He supposed being brave would be gathering up the chutzpah to actually go give the kid some damn flowers, maybe talk to his fuckin' gravemarker some, cry about how shitty his life was ever since Eren left it. Jesus Christ.

 

 

There wasn't a question anymore- Levi was going to go. He owed Eren that much. Just say hi. Maybe talk some. Pretend like Eren was there in front of him, that cold piece of marble the warm body of the brunet he used to love so much. He still loved so much.

 

 

But the noirette went, and he made his way to the grocery store down the way to pick up some roses. Nice ones. The twenty-dollar ones. The ones that smelt like life and happiness and all the shit Levi wished he had. Hell, he just wished he could go a week without busting into tears. Wouldn't that be an accomplishment?

 

 

Once he'd obtained the nicest roses available to the general public, Levi had made his way to the cemetery, flowers in hand. Even  _they_  seemed to shake, to wilt. Maybe even they knew how Levi felt. Dead, broken, wasted, useless, and a fucking softie to boot.

 

 

Either way, it had taken some time to actually search for Eren's grave. Almost an hour, to be exact. All these fucking dead people it was hard to tell which body was his. Haha, wow. That was morbid, Levi thinks to himself as he finally stumbles upon the marble reading his boyfriend's name.

 

 

Ah, yes. The nice smell of clean-cut, freshly done marble.

 

 

"Hi, Eren," Levi whispers, bending down to place the bouquet in a small, in-ground vase. "I bought these for you. They're pretty, right?" he said, a weak smile forcing its way onto his features. "Y'know," he started, "I bet that if you painted them, they'd be even more pretty. You do that a lot. Make things prettier. Or maybe my vision's going bad. Maybe things were just prettier when you were around," he finished, looking down, hair in his face.

 

 

“Sorry. That was probably, uh... Insensitive." he mumbles, running a hand through his hair. "I swear, I can hear your damn voice. 'When did you ever care about being insensitive?'" he mocked, eyes closing. "I dunno."

 

 

Levi turns, because he can't he can't do this anymore, he cannot stand on the ground Eren was six feet below. "I miss you. Come home sometime, okay? I love you."

 

 

No, no, no, no--

 

 

Well. Here come the water works, for the seven hundredth time this week.

 

 

“Fuck,” He choked out, and he wanted to run, get the hell away from there as fast as possible because this was a huge mistake, but his legs felt rooted to the ground, stuck to the soil like the damn piece of stone behind him. A part of him didn't want to leave, he wanted to stay with Eren for as long as he could, but if only he was  _alive_  and he wasn't. Now all he has is the tombstone that spells out Eren's name, birthday and that God awful day, like the fucking piece of marble was taunting him, and his boyfriend's body under the ground that would probably become the most beautiful flowers when he actually begins to rot. And imagining that made Levi sick to his stomach, because this was all too morbid and disgusting, but Eren was right there in front of him when he died and Levi didn't do shit, so he deserved to feel ill.

 

 

He turns back around one more time, glancing at the grave in front of him and the rows and rows of ones in the distance, a part of him hoping that he would see Eren walking towards him with that grin plastered onto his face, and he'd yell “Levi! I'm back”, but it never fucking happened, and Levi felt foolish to hope.

 

 

His knees threatening to give out beneath him, he made his way towards the gate of the cemetery, tears flowing down his face and blurring his vision. Levi had no idea where in the hell he would go: home was the first option, but it's too quiet, it makes his head spin. The railroad tracks were another option, and Levi seems to be okay with torturing himself, so he starts to walk towards the direction of the tracks, his legs moving as if he were a robot ordered to do so. It was still early, and he thinks it was Monday, but he didn't give a shit about time anymore; the more time that passes, the more time he spends without Eren. On the bright side, since it was an early Monday morning, there won't be people outside to stare at his crying, pathetic ass.

 

 

Bright side. Fucking hilarious.

 

 

Eren's eyes were bright. Bright and vivid and beautiful, and he couldn't shake the image of the bloodied corpse of Eren on the tracks, laying at an inhuman angle and his body a mess of blood and gore, his eyes still wide and open and they weren't beautiful, they were empty. Just empty.

 

 

He didn't know how long it took to get to the railroad tracks. Levi practically has the path to that place memorized; the amount of times Eren followed him to the damn place was unreal. It became  _their_  tracks, in a way. Now they were just Eren's. Deserved to be, anyway, since it was his blood that was spilled all over it.

 

 

The tracks were still the same. The piles of flowers and cards became bigger, hiding the bloodstain that he guessed was still on the rail.

 

 

Levi sat down in the grass once again, a sigh escaping his lips and his heart pounding in his chest. What he felt when he sat down, though, wasn't the ground beneath him, it-

 

 

He frowned and stood up. If he stopped crying before he reached the tracks, he sure as hell was crying now, and he fell to his knees in front of the backpack laying on the ground. Specifically, Eren's backpack, the thing he took to school every day when he was alive. The police probably didn't see it, which was why it was still resting in the grass.

 

 

Levi clutched it to his chest and sobbed, and he felt even more ridiculous for openly weeping over a fucking backpack, but he didn't really care anymore. Didn't care about anything, really. Eren wasn't coming back, and Eren was the one thing he loved more than anything else in this world full of shit, so if he wanted to cry over a backpack, he would cry over a backpack. It didn't matter.

 

 

He sat it back on the ground and sniffled, unzipping it and looking at the contents inside. Levi felt like a creep, really; dead or alive, this was still Eren's stuff, and he didn't have the right to go through his possessions like some sort of stalker. He peeked inside anyway, spotting three sketch books and a notebook, along with Eren's phone.

 

 

...He shouldn't be doing this.

 

 

It wasn't his. With a sigh, Levi zipped the bag shut and left it on the ground, standing up and stretching. He felt like it would be disrespectful to leave it by the tracks, or take it back to his place, without getting permission from Eren's parents beforehand. Eren might be his dead boyfriend, but he was their dead son, so he could leave it in Eren's bedroom, if they even allow Levi inside the house. It was what he _should_ do. Death shouldn't have turned him into a selfish little bastard. Maybe he always was a little bit selfish, but now was not the time for it.

 

 

He hoisted the bag up on his shoulder and walked towards the direction of Eren's house. Levi never really went to his boyfriend's house – most of the time, it was Eren staying over at Levi's house, since Levi's parents were in the military and they would be alone. Levi has met Eren's family a few times, though, and they all seemed alright with him. He wanted to know if they still were. Probably not.

 

 

Thankfully, Levi has been there enough to know where Eren lives (or lived, fuckin' hell), and Eren lived closer to the tracks than Levi currently does. He raised his fist to knock lightly on the door, hoping and praying that his parents were already awake. What was he going to say? “Hi, sorry if I woke you guys up, but I found your dead son's backpack because I went to the spot where he died, and turns out the police forgot it”. Mother of  _fuck._

 

 

Eren's very tired-looking mother answered the door, and she glanced at Levi, her eyes numb and her expression emotionless.

 

 

“I, uh - “ Shit. “I..found Eren's backpack, and-”

 

 

“You can put it in his room,” She rasped, her voice barely audible, as if she hasn't spoken in forever, “just..don't mess with anything already in there.”

 

 

Levi nodded as she moved away from the doorway and retreated back into the house. He stepped inside and quietly closed the front door, looking around the house, Eren's house, and God, he felt his eyes start to water again. Was this the..third time in the past hour?

 

 

He walked aimlessly around the house until he found Eren's bedroom, grasping the doorknob and squeezing his eyes shut. His whole hand shook – he felt as if he was trespassing, like he would taint the room just by stepping through the doorway and his bedspread would be covered in blood like the fucking tracks -

 

 

_STOP._

 

 

Levi took a deep breath and twisted the doorknob, watching as the door swung open in front of him with a creak. He bit his lip and stepped inside, gently placing the bag by Eren's door.

 

 

The room was exactly as he remembered it, with drawings and some photographs Levi took for him taped to the wall by his bed. An assortment of CDs were covering the nightstand, along with Eren's old radio, and Levi felt his heart ache when he realized he bought most of those CDs for Eren. Band T-shirts were strung all over the floor, and the bed was still messy and unmade, and God, it was all so normal, why was Eren  _dead._

 

 

He closed the door behind him and sat down on the floor, pulling his knees up to his chest and closing his eyes. Tears began to spill down his cheeks again, and he cried, he fucking cried on the floor of his dead boyfriend's bedroom, and he found himself hoping again. Hoping that he would hear tapping on Eren's window, and he would look up in confusion, only to find Eren peering inside and he'd do his cute little wave and Levi would open the window and ask himself  _why the hell is he outside -_

 

 

“I love you,” Levi whimpered.

 

 

~

 

 

After Levi went back home, he thought about walking into his own bedroom again. He almost did. Almost. He decided that he definitely wasn't ready, and kicked off his boots by the front door, climbing onto the couch and wrapping the cover around his body. The clock on the wall read a quarter past two in the afternoon, and he sighed, realizing that he was actually kind of productive. Productive in the sense that he mourned his boyfriend in a way that wasn't drinking booze and writing notes.

 

 

He frowned when he heard a faint noise in the distance.

 

 

His phone.

 

 

Levi wondered why anyone would want to call him, and he stood up, walking into the kitchen. He left his cellphone on the kitchen table, because if anyone wanted to call him, he didn't want an excuse to go into his bedroom because he left the phone on his nightstand.

 

 

When he saw who was calling him, he almost fainted.

 

 

Plain as fucking day, Eren's phone number, Levi's phone vibrating and ringing -

 

 

He answered the call and placed the phone up to his ear, his eyes widening in a mixture of horror and disbelief and his pounding heart echoing in his ears.

 

 

Static.

 

 

He frowned, his hand clutching around the phone. “Eren?!? Eren, who is this, what the fuck do you-”

 

 

“-vi.”

 

 

Levi could barely hear it, it was muffled by all the static, and it sounded like an echo. But it was definitely there. He strained to hear more, but all he heard was white noise.

 

 

The call ended.

 

 

_Beep..beep..._

 

 

“Oh my fucking God,” He breathed, almost dropping the phone onto the floor below him. That was definitely Eren's voice, and he wondered who would pull such a sick joke, but a part of him prayed it wasn't a prank.

 

 

He quickly dialed Eren's number again, wondering if anyone would answer. It rang once. Twice. Three times. He lost count, and then there was Eren, and-

 

 

“Hi, this is Eren. I'm not here right now. Leave a message!”

 

 

_Beeeep._


	4. Four - Memories - Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rednecks, Ghostbusters, creepy cute boys, and Levi's savior, the Dick Lord.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is 20 fucking pages long and this is only part one so enjoy. also phoenix (hi) wrote this whole entire thing so if there's any mistakes i apologize.
> 
> okay so warnings for slurs and bullying, and there's one part towards the end that could be cissexist? i'm not sure if it would make anyone uncomfortable because it may or may not be interpreted as 'all dudes have dicks', which is not what we meant, we just weren't sure if anyone would feel uncomfortable by it.

 

 

It started whenever Levi entered the cafeteria on his first day at the new school – or, more accurately, his first day in Hell. He just wasn't sure what “it” was. Love? Their relationship? The second the hot-ass known as Eren Jaeger entered his life? He didn't really know what “it” stood for, but the message behind it was important, nonetheless.

 

 

When Levi said that school was his own personal hell, he fucking means it. High school was awful in general, academic wise, but the people you go to school with could make it a somewhat positive experience. This was not the case. There were five people Levi knew personally that he could tolerate, the rest of the people he tolerated were people he didn't know at all. And there was that list titled “People I Love” with that one boy on it – Eren got his own fucking category, thank you. Anyone else, however, made him want to light something on fire. That something is usually himself, just so he could escape a world that spit out people like Buck Richardson.

 

 

Buck Richardson was a human personification of every redneck stereotype you have ever heard. His wardrobe consists of mainly John Deere shirts and camo jackets, and, to top it all off, he wore his belt with the confederate flag printed across it every single day. Levi would have no problem with his attire (minus the confederate flag thing, anyone that puts the confederate flag on anything just screams 'douche bag that supports slavery') if it wasn't for the fact that every word he spewed out was, well, kind of disgusting. He made Levi's first day at Personal Hell High School shitty, and Eren kind of made it better, but everything on that day was just a steaming pile of your neighbors' dog shit that was left right in your lawn.

 

 

Levi learned about the redneck asshole crew the second he stepped onto the school parking lot, where Buck Richardson and his herd were leaning against a pickup truck and talking about God-knows-what. (His herd, come to find out, were no more tolerant than Buck, but that's a story for another day.) Levi planned to blend in with the crowd as well as he could, because he didn't want to deal with his peers on the first day. He needed the chance to judge them all from afar before he could have a conversation with them. He was naive to think that his plan would work, because the second he stepped onto the asphalt parking lot, he locked eyes with Buck. It was a short period of uncomfortable eye contact, and then his friends decided to join in on the staring contest, too.

 

 

That was when Buck whistled.

 

 

“Well fuck me sideways, look at the he-she over here!”

 

 

And thus, the beginning of the rivalry between Buck(et of piss) Richardson and Levi.

 

 

He went to his first class, where the teacher made him introduce himself at the front of the fucking room, and then an enthusiastic student offered to show him around the school. Levi complied, because he had no other choice, really. The student, a nonbinary dork with a Ghostbusters hoodie and glasses bigger than their whole face, was Hanji. Levi decided that they were annoying, but they were certainly a relief after dealing with The Herd in the parking lot.

 

 

The rest of the morning passed slowly, with Levi trying to avoid Buck as much as he possibly could. It's not that he was afraid of him. Hell no. He just didn't want to get in a fight on his first day of school. He had boundaries, okay. He didn't want to wreck Buck's face when they hardly knew each other.

 

 

Lunch rolled around, and Levi entered the cafeteria in a state that could only be described as horror. He hoped, he _prayed,_ that there was an empty table somewhere, and his prayers were answered, thankfully. Right in a dark corner of the cafeteria was a slightly depressing table, with cobwebs surrounding the floor and chairs that squeaked under his weight. The surface of the table featured a wide variety of carvings, Levi's favorite being “JACK SUCKS COW DICK”. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, huh?

 

 

He had an interesting view of the cafeteria from the corner, too. The closest table featured a girl with a red scarf hugged tightly around her shoulders, a blonde kid that seemed more interested in the book he was reading than the conversation Scarf Girl and another kid were having, but the other guy seemed to be multitasking with both talking and drawing.

 

 

Levi realized he was staring whenever Doodle Boy looked up at met his eyes.

 

 

Fuck. Staring contest #2.

 

 

He quickly averted his gaze to another table, only to find Hanji waving both arms in the air from across the room, their eyes wide as they mouthed 'HI LEVI'. Levi did a half-assed wave back, and sighed, deciding to stare at a spider in the corner, who was eagerly trying to spin its web. He decided that he would let it live if it did not touch his damn food. Or him.

 

 

The sound of a rusty creak startled him, and his head snapped up, only to find Doodle Boy sitting down across from him as he placed his sketchbook and pencil onto the table.

 

 

 

“The _fuck-“_

 

 

Wonderful way for Levi to introduce himself. He would have said more if he knew that Eren would end up being his boyfriend, and sometimes he laughs about his simple “the fuck”. But he couldn't blame himself, because really, that first day was one of the worst days he's ever had. The day ended up being a trainwreck before noon, holy shit.

 

 

He looked up at Levi – damn were those eyes _vivid_ \- and flipped to a blank page in his sketchbook, picking up his pencil and giving a small smile.

 

 

“You the new guy?”

 

 

Levi grunted a “yeah”, wondering why in the hell no one has gotten lunch yet. He wasn't going to be the first to get a tray full of garbage that passed as food. He wasn't going to be the last, either. Fuck no. Fuck this school.

 

 

“Well, hi. I'm Eren.”

 

 

“Good to know.”

 

 

Levi picked at the edges of a poorly-drawn cow carving on the table, forming a theory that it went with the Jack statement.

 

 

“You got a name?” Eren asked, breaking the silence. He seemed like a happy little bastard. Levi told him, still not looking up from the tabletop.

 

 

Another minute or so passed in silence, the only noise the surrounding voices of the cafeteria and the scratch of pencil on paper.

 

 

“Levi, uh, don't know if you're hungry or whatever but they're serving lunch now. 'M not hungry but your best bet here is the chicken nuggets. It's the least disgusting food they have.”

 

 

Levi's eyes trailed to the front of the room, where people were lining up to get their trays. He mumbled a quick “thanks”, and hurried to the back of the (thankfully) short line. He was starving. He was used to getting lunch at 10:30 because his old school fucked up his diet - at his new one, lunch started at 12:00. That's a whole one hour and thirty minute difference. Fuckin' torture. He took Eren's advice and settled on the chicken nuggets, walking back through the maze of lunch tables and kept his eyes locked on the table in the dark corner, where Eren was still drawing. Upon a closer, quick, over-Eren's-shoulder inspection, he realized that Eren was drawing Levi himself. Maybe he wasn't, but it looked a lot like him. Eren had already drawn an outline of a head and a pierced left eyebrow.

 

 

Levi sat down in his seat, a frown spreading across his face. “What the hell, kid? Do you just-” Levi waved a hand, cocking the eyebrow Eren decided to draw first, what the fuck, “-do you just fucking draw random strangers? That's stalker-like, what the hell is wrong with this school.”

 

 

Eren looked up and mimicked Levi's frown. “Didn't think you'd mind, dude. At least it's _good,_ you knew it was you by an eyebrow and the shitty head shape.”

 

 

Damn. The kid had a point.

 

 

And that was the beginning of the so-called “it”. Eren continued to sit at Levi's lunch table, after he spent a few moments talking to Scarf Girl and Book Boy beforehand – he later learned that their names were Mikasa and Armin, and Mikasa was Eren's adoptive sister. Levi could tell that the trio was close. Within that week, Levi and Eren somehow became friends, and Eren finished that drawing of Levi by Friday, and it literally shocked Levi into silence. He was incredible. His art was literally professional looking. It looked like a fucking portrait.

 

 

The pattern fell into place, and soon enough, Levi started to adjust to the school and his peers. In the blink of an eye, the days started to fade into October, and Hanji seemed interested in sitting at their lunch table and telling both him and Eren about ghost hunting and the paranormal hot spots around town. They didn't really care, but it was fun listening to Hanji ramble. Hanji also seemed to enjoy playing matchmaker and pushing Levi and Eren's heads together so they could kiss.

 

 

Eren ended up coming over to Levi's house on Halloween night, and they watched cheesy horror movies that had more gore than was necessary, and Eren would always throw popcorn at Levi when he criticized the characters' life choices.

 

 

“Watching movies with you sucks ass,” Eren had complained.

 

 

“Is that so?”

 

 

“Shut your fucking mouth.”

 

 

Levi ignored him and continued to cuss out the fucking shitheads that decided it would be a good idea to venture into the abandoned mannequin factory at fucking _midnight,_ when their parents have told them since they were children that they should avoid the abandoned mannequin factory at all costs, and Eren groaned every time Levi spoke and shoved handfuls of microwavable popcorn into his mouth the whole time. There was also a movie with a goddamned terrifying jump scare that made Levi hop up in the air and squeak, and made Eren jump up and spill the rest of his popcorn, but the little bastard couldn't stop laughing at the fact that _”oh my God dude did you just scream”,_ and Levi took that as an opportunity to go make him more popcorn, because fuck it if he wasn't blushing in a mixture of anger and embarrassment.

 

 

Needless to say, Halloween was interesting.

 

 

November came and went. Eren continued to draw, Levi continued to do assignments for his photography class, and walking home with each other and eating lunch together became a normal part of their week. And somewhere within that month, Levi started to realize he was definitely developing feelings for Eren. He realized this on a cold November afternoon, and they were walking on the quiet sidewalk, and Levi's fingers were red and numb and he couldn't stop staring at one of Eren's hands and he eventually thought, fuck, that hand should be in mine. And that was when Eren caught his stare and gave him a small smile, and damn if Levi wasn't thinking about how Eren's cheeks and nose were red and it looked adorable, and his eyes were the prettiest color he's ever seen in his life.

 

 

He wasted no time deciding that he wanted every little bit of Eren.

 

 

December was lonely. A two week long break separated Levi and Eren, and it was right when he started to accept that he had a crush on him, too. Christmas was upsetting. His parents didn't even bother to call that year, and Eren was preoccupied with plans. He tried to get ahold of Petra, too, who he hasn't talked to since he moved, and that made him feel like shit. She was also busy, but she said she would update him on his old school later. He even thought about calling Hanji, but he realized they would probably start talking about the ghost of Christmas past, or whatever the fuck.

 

 

During the weird holiday limbo between Christmas and New Year's Eve, he spent most of his time in bed, and sometimes, he would venture outside and take pictures if he liked the way the sun was setting over the snow. He watched the ball in Times Square drop on New Year's, and he may or may not have been thinking about kissing Eren during the countdown. That was when Levi realized he was in so deep he couldn't even see the light anymore.

 

 

When he went back to school, he was more than happy to start up the routine with Eren again. He showed Levi all of the pictures that he drew over break – including a very neatly colored one that featured Levi as one of Santa's elves, he was _not_ happy about that – and they continued to walk home together in the freezing cold weather. Levi's feelings for Eren grew even stronger, and he noticed that the urge to kiss him was probably never going to go away unless he did something about it.

 

 

In the blink of an eye, a few months passed and it marked the beginning of April, and they continued the old routine. The routine, however, ended on a particular Friday.

 

 

After the 3:00 bell rang, Levi gathered up his items and rushed to the bathroom. He wanted to wash his hands, because he had just got done conducting a science experiment, and it involved bacteria and fungi. It was disgusting. He took a mental note to not trust his science teacher for the rest of the year, the ass wipe. At least it was the weekend, and he wouldn't have to deal with this shitty ass school for two full days.

 

 

Whenever he pushed open the bathroom door, who he found standing in front of a mirror was Eren, a bruise blossoming around his eye and a piece of white-and-red toilet paper shoved close to his nose. Levi's bag dropped from his shoulder almost immediately, and then he was rushing across the bathroom to help Eren, who's eyes widened upon noticing that Levi had entered. Levi gently grabbed the wrist that was holding the piece of toilet paper and pulled it away from Eren's face, discovering that, yes, the nose bleed was a gusher, and judging by the circumstances, someone did this to him. Unless Eren falls down sometimes and busts his nose and gets a black eye, but whatever.

 

 

“Fuckin' shit, Eren,” Levi said under his breath, letting go of Eren's hand and leaning towards the sink to wash his hands, which was his original purpose of coming into the bathroom. He generally avoided public restrooms unless he had to. “What happened?”

 

 

“Nothing.”

 

 

The answer was so quiet Levi had to struggle to hear it over the running water. After he washed off the soap, turned off the sink and proceeded to wipe his hands off on his pants, he turned back around to face Eren, who almost looked ashamed. Levi took note and tried to make his voice sound as gentle as possible, so Eren didn't think he was angry at him.

 

 

“Did you punch yourself in the face or did someone do this to you?”

 

 

That is probably where his gentleness failed, but whatever, it was a noble effort.

 

 

It took awhile for Eren to reply, but Levi was patient. He fidgeted and hesitated, and Levi decided that maybe he just fell and he was embarrassed to admit it, or something. He knows what it looks like when someone gets punched in the face repeatedly, though, and this is what it looked like. There was no way in hell that this was just from falling.

 

 

“I couldn't fight back, alright? There's four of 'em. Two held me back and the others turned me into a punching bag, so it's not like I could do much. They're all on the football team. I can fight, okay, but not when I'm being held back, and they got me by sur-”

 

 

“Who was it?”

 

 

Eren stopped talking and frowned, looking away from Levi by averting his gaze to the floor. “Not important.”

 

 

“Yeah, it fucking is.”

 

 

“It doesn't matter. I just want to go home, okay?”

 

 

_“Eren.”_

 

 

Eren sighed and looked back up at Levi. “It was that Buck kid and his friends. I don't know them and I don't talk to them so I never paid attention to their names..”

 

 

Levi frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. Looks like Buck and the herd were even bigger pieces of shit than he originally thought.

 

 

“You mean Buck Richardson and his herd of ass rabbits?”

 

 

Levi wasn't even aware he just called them ass rabbits until Eren was grinning. “..Ass rabbits?”

 

 

“Yes. They're complete fucking ass rabbits.”

 

 

He gave a small laugh and tossed his piece of toilet paper, which was now almost entirely crimson, into the nearby trashcan, and retreated into the stall behind him to get a new piece.

 

 

“Ya know,” Eren added, “I called Mikasa an obnoxious marshmallow once. We were arguing over who won in Monopoly. We were...eleven, I think.”

 

 

Levi grinned as Eren turned back around, a fresh piece of toilet paper held up to his face. Levi could see that the bleeding was finally starting to stop.

 

 

“Hey, Eren, do you feel up for walking home with me, or..”

 

 

“If you let me draw you smiling later.”

 

 

Levi wasn't sure if that was flirting or not, but he found himself hoping it was.

 

 

~

 

 

The next Monday was when he discovered the tracks.

 

 

It was mid-April, and it was, oddly enough, hotter than hell. He was walking home alone, which usually took an hour at the least, and wearing all black with the sun beating down on you is not a pleasant experience. So, to escape the sun's harsh rays and get home where he had air conditioning, he tried to find a short cut. Levi had no idea _why_ he tried to navigate himself through a town he still didn't know very well, and why he just didn't stick to the original path and put up with the sweat, but he found himself cutting through a vacant lot that had grass growing up to his knees, anyway. He wasn't even sure if this was the right direction, but oh fucking well.

 

 

Just as he shrugged off his leather jacket, he came across a set of train tracks.

 

 

At first glance, Levi decided that they weren't in use, or they weren't used that often. Cars on the bridge above the tracks passed by, and the whole entire area was surrounded in flowers, flowers, and more flowers. Levi sat down in the grass next to the tracks and examined the area some more. Minus the traveling cars, the area was secluded, and it was nothing short of peaceful with a cheesy kind of beautiful that you would see in an Oscar award winning movie.

 

 

Completely forgetting about his previous goal to get home before he died of a heat stroke, he dropped his bag and jacket on the ground next to him, pulled out one of his textbooks and pencils, and started to do his homework. Hell, it's not like his parents are going to be home and chew him out for staying out so late without calling them.

 

 

His mind was quickly taken off of history homework, though, whenever he started to think about Eren. During the school year, he's definitely fallen for him, whether he wanted to or not. It was something about his passion for drawing and how he was an honest to God sweet person, and you don't meet a lot of genuinely good people in the cafeteria of a high school. Levi was one of the lucky ones. The Buck incident must have scared him shitless, though - he practically begged to stay at Levi's house so he wouldn't have to explain what happened to his parents, because, apparently, Buck has been throwing verbal attacks at him since the beginning of the eighth grade, but this was the first time he's psychically attacked him. It was also the first time Eren was introduced to Buck's friends. Eren stated that he was terrified to go back to school Monday because he didn't want to get beaten again, and Levi felt so bad for him.

 

 

Eren left shortly after 5:00. They didn't really talk for the rest of the weekend, but Levi found himself thinking about calling or texting him more times than he's proud of. Eren was on his mind all weekend, actually, but Levi wasn't going to bother him with his gay feelings about crushes or whatever. Because that's what this was, right? He felt like a third grader all over again, back when he was obsessed with Fall Out Boy and wrote “LEVI + PETE WENTZ = LOVE” on the inside cover of his notebook. Eren was probably straight, anyway. Levi always ended up falling for the straight ones.

 

 

But still, he had no idea if Eren even liked him back. He wasn't ready to jump into a relationship with Eren if they both weren't ready. Jesus Christ, he needed to stop thinking about dating cute boys.

 

 

Eren wasn't at school that day, either. Levi figured he must have told his parents and they didn't want him going, or maybe Eren just faked ill. Either way, Levi can honestly say he missed him a little bit. Or, more accurately, painfully missed him, and it's only been one day.

 

 

~

 

 

He stayed there for a good three hours, and for those three hours, his thoughts were racing.

 

 

“Feelings are weird,” Levi mumbled, looking up at the setting sky, filled with pinks and blues and oranges. With a sigh, he stood up and stretched, yawned, and then slung his bag over his shoulder. Taking one last look at the tracks, and leaving a mental note that he should come here more often, he made his way back up the grassy hill and through the abandoned lot. With the sun setting, it was finally starting to cool down, and it felt pleasant after the miserable upper-80s weather.

 

 

Levi decided that, yes, the scenery at the tracks was gorgeous, but it would be even more gorgeous with Eren.

 

 

~

 

 

A few more weeks passed and the calender shifted into May, and Levi still found himself wanting to be around Eren as much as possible. Now that the school year was close to an end (Jesus _Christ_ it went by fast) he had to face the fact that he probably wouldn't see Eren all summer. And, after Levi woke up from a slightly odd dream that involved kissing on a hill by a certain set of railroad tracks, he was not ready to give the kid up. He woke up in shock, to say the least. Holy shit, he just had a dream about _kissing_  Eren, and it was actually..a pleasant feeling. Well, Dream Levi thought it was pleasant, anyway. Maybe Levi was still bitter about the fact that he was fifteen and he hasn't fucking kissed anyone yet.

 

 

Levi also discovered that he was selfish. He talked to Eren almost every day, and sometimes Eren would walk home with him and stay at Levi's house for a little bit, but that wasn't enough. He wanted more. Wanted to hold him, and maybe, _maybe_ sing to him, and maybe Eren could play with his hair and then he could kiss Eren and pull him closer and run his hand down his neck and-

 

 

_I'm so fucking gay._

 

 

But still, Levi read somewhere that if a crush lasts for more than four months, it's love. He doesn't know if that's a good or bad sign.

 

 

~

 

 

The last day of school came and went, and he still had yet to make a move on Eren mother fucking Jaeger. He cared so much about this kid to the point where he was having trouble sleeping because he wants to text or call him. So, Levi figured, fuck it, he should just go ahead and ask him out. Somehow. And that was probably going to backfire horribly, but oh well, it's worth an effort. If Eren didn't like him back, well, okay, he didn't.

 

 

The summer was boring without him.

 

 

It was noon, so unless Eren was one of those sleep-until-5 type of people, he figured that would be a good time to call him. Sure enough, he ended up answering, and Levi felt his heart skip a beat.

 

 

“Hey, Levi.” He sounded sleepy. Jesus mother fucking Christ on a cracker, what if Levi woke him up. What if he had bed hair and was wearing a shirt that was too big for him.

 

 

“Do you wanna do something today?” Levi replied, a bit too quickly, and that was when he was realized that he has evolved into Dork of the Year. Stop thinking about how adorable Eren was and focus on making a move on the fucker.

 

 

“Yeah! Yeah sure, what time?”

 

 

Dammit. He didn't plan a time beforehand. “Is 1:00 okay? You know where I live, right?”

 

 

Levi felt absolutely fucking ridiculous and regretted this almost immediately. Eren would say no and then think of Levi as the gay freak. He was a gay freak, yeah, but he didn't want Eren to know that. His mind was racing – he was debating on whether or not he should try to ask the cute ass out or no. Fuck it. He would just wait and see how Eren was feeling that day.

 

 

“Yeah. I might be late because I still have to get out of bed and shit.”

 

 

“That's fine,” Levi replied. He could feel himself smiling. Fucking hell.

 

 

“What are we gonna do?”

 

 

“You'll see.”

 

 

There was a pause.

 

 

“...Alright. See you at one, then.”

 

 

 

~

 

 

Levi lead the way to the tracks, Eren trailing along at his side in unusual silence. He wasn't talking much at all. Not about his drawings, not about how the summer has been so far, nothing. It was beginning to worry Levi, the fucker should be rambling about everything that's happened to him the second he left school. Or maybe Levi didn't know him that well after all.

 

 

They were crossing the street when Levi finally broke the silence that settled between them.

 

 

“Somethin' wrong?”

 

 

Eren looked at Levi, and then hung his head low, taking interest in his shoes. “Nothing's wrong. Just nervous.”

 

 

Levi was about to ask why he was nervous, but he bit his tongue and decided that it wasn't his business, and if it was, Eren would have told him.

 

 

They continued to walk around town, and Levi realized that this was worse than he originally thought it would be. He had no idea how to get to the tracks from his house. They passed the same graveyard at least three times, their school more times than he could count, and at one point they started to go down the street that Eren lived on, and Levi only realized this when Eren asked why they were going back to his house. The town wasn't _that_ big. How hard was it to find a pair of railroad tracks?

 

 

Much to Levi's relief, he found a street that looked familiar, and he saw an old antique store with the vacant lot sitting next to it, as always.

 

 

Levi cut through the grass and he saw Eren frown out of the corner of his eye.

 

 

“Are you sure we're going the right way?” Eren asked as he examined their surroundings.

 

 

Levi took the time to stop in his tracks, cross his arms, and stare at Eren with his eyebrows furrowed. “...Are you _doubting_ me, Eren?”

 

 

Eren turned around quickly and stared back, opening and closing his mouth a couple of times in hesitation. You could read the kid like a fucking book. He looked like a deer in headlights, his eyes wide in an emotion that could only be described as terror. “No! I wanted to kn-”

 

 

“I'm just fucking with you, don't worry.” Levi caught up with Eren, using all of his strength to stop himself from laughing. He didn't even intend to scare the piss out of Eren, but he did, so it was kind of funny. He could hardly keep a straight face, and he felt like a douche. He _was_ a douche. At least he could admit it. Eren's face was priceless, though. Seriously. He was so cute. Levi has never felt this way over another person before. It was kind of nice, really.

 

 

“Oh my God, I'm already nervous, you're an asshole,” Eren grumbled.

 

 

“I know.”

 

 

“Stop smiling.”

 

 

“Am I being an obnoxious marshmallow?”

 

 

Eren huffed. “Dick.”

 

 

Levi noticed the hint of a smile on Eren's face.

 

 

The rest of the walk to the tracks passed in silence. When Levi finally saw the bridge, and the tracks laying on the ground, he felt his heart speed up, pounding in his chest like a bass drum. Fuck. Fuck, he was seriously going to do this. Shiiiit.

 

 

“Yeah. Here we are,” He announced, gesturing towards the hill and the tracks below. Eren stood without speaking, but then made his way toward the hill that was decorated in an assortment of flowers. He turned back around to face Levi, and his eyes lit up in a way that Levi only saw when he was drawing. Levi figured the scenery was giving him inspiration.

 

 

“It's...really pretty. Thanks.”

 

 

He smirked and nodded, moving towards the hill. “My pleasure.” Levi sat down in the same spot he was at the other day, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around his legs. Eren plopped down next to him and looked around.

 

 

“You should see it at sunset.”

 

 

Eren frowned. “My family would get worried if I stayed out that late...”

 

 

Fuck. There goes the plan to ask Eren out at sunset. Should he just go with the plan and get it over with? Was it too early? Fuckfuckfuckfuck. Levi bit his lip and glanced at a flower he was sitting next to, as if he would find the answer inside its petals. What kind of advice is a fucking flower going to give him? Jesus Christ. He looked up at the grey sky, the clouds threatening rain, and he hoped that he would hear a crack of thunder and it would start piss pouring so he'd have an excuse to go home and rethink his life choices.

 

 

“Hey, Eren,” He croaked, and fuck, fuck he was actually going to do this, there's no turning back now. Why didn't he pay attention to dating advice at his old school, even when it wasn't directed at him. Why did he have to do this right at that moment. Why did he feel the fucking butterflies in his stomach and why the hell did he want to burn the butterflies alive.

 

 

“Yeah?”

 

 

Levi took a deep breath. And then he breathed out, and took another one. He stared straight ahead and tried to avoid the teal eyes that were surely watching him.

 

 

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "You ever kissed anyone?"

 

 

He said it too quickly and his voice sounded foreign in his own ears, but yes, those words definitely just left his mouth, and yes, Eren was definitely sitting next to him in complete and utter silence and Levi felt a knot form in his stomach that twisted at his insides and made him ache. His heart was beating against his rib cage and he was surprised it hasn't exploded in some sort of freak accident.

 

 

“No,” Eren said quietly, and Levi still refused to look at him, refused to see Eren's facial expression because he was probably as weirded out as ever. Levi waited for Eren to add more to his simple “no”, because the more comments Eren made, the better, but after a solid minute passed without any talking, he realized that Eren wasn't going to add more to his statement. Was Eren as nervous as he was? Fucking shit, this was surreal.

 

 

Levi cleared his throat again. “Guess that makes two of us."

 

 

He finally looked away from the tracks and turned his head to face Eren, and their eyes met. Eren was staring back at him and even though he was an open book Levi couldn't read the expression on his face because the words on the page were jumbled and mixed but Goddamn if their faces weren't close and fuck fuck fuck those eyes, those lips and _Eren._

 

 

Eren opened his mouth to speak, but stopped, and before Levi could even ask they were both leaning towards each other and Levi's arms moved to wrap around Eren's neck and _what the hell this is an uncomfortable position_ , and Eren laughed as Levi turned his body to face him and after a quiet “shut up” directed towards Eren, their lips met and fuck. The kiss was sloppy and they both had no idea what in the hell they were doing but it was passionate, it was meaningful and it was everything Levi could have ever wanted. The kiss was everything in itself and fuck it all if Eren wasn't the best person to share the moment with and when they finally pulled away to breathe, their foreheads pressed against each other's, Levi heard a small whine escape his throat because he wanted more. He wanted everything. And Eren laughed at that, the fucker. It was a small, cute little laugh and Levi felt Eren's breath on his skin as they both panted. They stayed like that for a few moments, until Levi opened his eyes, only to discover that Eren's were open, too. They didn't pull away, but Eren's lips curved into a small smile, and Levi didn't know if he was supposed to smile back or not. He was a wreck. A trainwreck over relationships, which he wasn't that proud of, but who gave a fuck.

 

 

And then Eren's smile fell into a frown. “I thought you were straight.”

 

 

Levi erupted into laughter and leaned back, covering his mouth with his hand, his sides stabbing with pain. Straight. _Straight._ That was a funny fucking joke, oh God.  Fuck. Anyone that knew Levi for more than five seconds knew that the words “Levi” and “heterosexual” do not go together at all. Jesus. That was a good one, Eren. When Levi was finally able to breathe again, he looked up at Eren, who was laughing quietly, too. Good. Levi didn't want Eren to think that he was laughing at him, or something. He was laughing at the fact that someone actually thought he was straight. Incredible. Fucking incredible. Holy shit. He probably hasn't laughed like that since he was a newborn, or something.

 

 

“Eren,” Levi said, a grin plastered onto his face, and Eren looked kind of terrified, “I'm about as gay as they come. If you know what I mean. Don't take it the wrong way-”

 

 

“Sh-shut the fuck up 'cause I'm about to start laughing my ass off. Dude, how was I supposed to kn-”

 

 

 _“Eren,_ oh my God, you adorable fuck. I'm a raging homosexual. I fucking  worship the Dick Lord, okay. My religion is Dicks. Just a dick in every form, a shrine dedicated to the almighty penis, a dick goin' up my ass.”

 

 

He snickered at that. “The Dick Lord? Really? Don't make me regret kissing you, holy shit.”

 

 

Ouch. He made a move on the kid and he probably just ruined everything he had going for himself. “...Rude.” Levi pouted and sniffled. “Don't insult my lord and savior. I prayed to Dick and asked for a piece of your ass and it worked. I've been _blessed.”_

 

 

Eren buried his face in his hands and sighed. “Oh my God.”

 


	5. note

alright i wasn't sure how i should do this but OKAY. we're not going to be continuing this fic anymore for

 

1\. personal reasons

2\. me (as in phoe, or phoenix whatever you want to call me) not really being a huge fan of this ship anymore (i'm p sure eeeeeeeeeeren is but iiiiiiii on the other hand am not)

 

HOWEVER!!!!! i'm probably gonna rewrite this whole thing, but instead of snk characters i'm gonna be using ocs. i'm obviously not going to be posting it on here because this is a website for fanfics, but i'll figure out something. i might post about it a little bit on my tumblr (petalvamp.tumblr.com) but i may not idk.

 

also i hate reading a fanfic and never finding out how it ends so this was the planned ending:

levi ends up living until like his 30s with a career in photography and he gets water color tattoos kind of as a tribute to eren. he ends up dying in a car crash and he goes to this heaven afterlife place that's a big pretty fancy field with a house and eren's there and they're both 17 again for some reason and they all live Happily Ever After. also levi finds out about ghost eren and they communicate using EVPs and all that fancy ghost hunting shit.

 

i hope u guys understand our reasons for not continuing this. i would have felt shitty if i just orphaned/deleted it without any explanation so here it is. thanks for reading the..four chapters of it that we had though. again i'm probably gonna turn this into an original story with ocs and idk what i'm gonna do with that but i'm definitely gonna do something. i think. whatever.


End file.
